Let’s Talk About Sex Baby

I’m experiencing a sexual renaissance that reminds me of how sex felt when I was in my 20’s.

The difference is that while my younger self had no idea what to do with all her sexual energy, I have years of tantra practice and experience to help direct me. Boy am I having fun.

Now that I’m “back online” so to speak, I’m reminded how important it is to share what I know. Because so many women, young and old, are told that their sexuality is irrelevant, or unimportant, or even shameful. Women aren’t supposed to be as sexual as men. Women are supposed to prefer love over sex. Women are supposed to have trouble with climaxing while it’s easy for men. The myths go on and on. I feel like these are ideas cultivated by our culture to keep women under control. Because Heaven knows what would happen if women owned their true sexual power.

I haven’t written about sex for a long while, honestly because my own sexuality was, well, sort of declining. I had a long period of celibacy after a long term relationship ended. I was still enjoying regular orgasms on my own, but it wasn’t really the same. I got into this mindset of thinking I was no longer attractive to men, and that maybe I would never be in a relationship again.

Looking back I can see how silly that head space was, but I had bought into all the propaganda that women over 50 are no longer sexual or desirable. I swallowed all of it. I had my hair cut short, stopped feeling or dressing sexy, and yes of course men stopped being interested. My energy literally started saying “keep out”. And the sad thing is, that this is something that can happen to a woman at ANY age. I’ve seen it over and over.

Fortunately for me, Spirit always comes in and shakes things up when I get stuck like that. A man came into my life that I actually liked. And I realized one problem wasn’t so much that men weren’t interested in me, it was that I wasn’t interested in THEM. I hadn’t been meeting any high quality men at all. And as time went on, I got out, met more men, and saw that in fact I had a LOT of choices about who to be in relationship with. In fact, men were very interested in me once I took down my “no trespassing” sign.

As I started to experience amazing, multi-orgasmic sex again, I remembered who I was, that sexuality is a basic human function, and that just because I’m “of a certain age” didn’t mean I had to shut that shop down. And can I just say….I’ve been a holistic, herbal, homeopathic, energy healer my whole life…but sometimes you need help from Western Medicine. Hormone Replacement Therapy has made a HUGE change in my ability to get aroused, not be horribly dry during sex, and climax more easily.

Just a few days ago during lovemaking, I experienced what tantra might call a valley orgasm. Instead of a huge, sharp, peak that lasts a minute or so, I had spontaneous multiple orgasms. Neither I nor my partner were really doing much to make them continue, they just kept going and going. it went on so long (maybe 5 -10 minutes) that we both started to laugh, because they JUST WOULDN”T STOP.

Now that’s the kind of pleasure we all deserve, isn’t it?

Journey to Sexual Wholeness: Six Gateways to Sacred Sexuality is a book designed to help you connect to your inner pleasure.  It contains a set of healing practices that can help to heal past trauma find your way to a vibrant life filled with joy and pleasure.