There’s magic in the air today.
For two years I’ve been working towards a vision of a life that I love–a home that fits me, a car that makes me smile (rather than worry things are going to fall off it), work that is fulfilling and authentic, and a relationship that is passionate, satisfying, and committed. Suddenly today a wave of good feeling washed over me. It hit while I was pouring myself a glass of water. I realized that the life I’ve been visioning is partly here, and it feels so GOOD.
It’s kind of snuck up on me. While I did ask Spirit back in December for the birthday gift of a life I love, I didn’t really expect it to happen. You know how that is, right?
It all began with my relationship. Last year I did a “relationship cleanse”, stopping all dating for 8 months. It was weirdly good, after two marriages and a live-in boyfriend, to learn about myself, who I am, and what I want.
So there I was, minding my own business, and getting pretty comfortable with being solo, when an old love rekindled in my life. It was like lighting a candle, which then became ten candles, and then a roaring bonfire. Since my time alone had shown me what I DID and DID NOT want in relationship, I was able to speak that loud and clear, which set us up for a completely different dynamic. It’s been really good. Sure we still have our struggles — after all we are both over 50 and prone to curmudgeonry. But it feels like coming home.
Next there was a shift in my work. I’ve been an entrepreneur for 10 years now, and my business had been hit really hard by the “Great Recession”. Diligent work was only resulting in barely getting by. I was starting to wonder if I was going to have to give up my dreams and get a J-O-B. (Shudder).
And what happened? I failed utterly. I put on an event and nobody came. And I got really really ANGRY at God. I cussed, I swore, I cried for 2 days. (I also repeatedly called the Goddess a very bad word….). And at the bottom of that anger I found myself. I realized that the event failed because I was not being true to myself. I was trying to be something I’m not, to be “acceptable” to others, rather than just following my heart and being authentic. So I came out of the closet, finally, and declared myself a shaman. After all, I had nothing left to lose.
Almost overnight, my practice tripled, and since that time a few months ago, money has continuously streamed in to support me. My business is booming, because I’m doing what I LOVE.
And this brings me to…dah dah dah….the car.
For the last four years I’ve been driving this ancient Toyota Camry. It is (or rather now, WAS) a true antique, made in 1988. By my calculations that makes Jasmine (my name for her) 27 years old.
So little wonder that a few days ago, she died. I could feel it coming, because I have REALLY good intuition. I kept hearing, for the last three months, a voice saying, “It’s time to get a new car”. I’ve been diligently putting money away, being frugal, thinking about what kind of car I want.
So when the axle broke off inside the transmission, I was mostly grateful. I was grateful that it happened AFTER I had just exited the freeway. I was grateful that AAA sent a tow truck to rescue me. I was grateful that my sweetheart was nearby to give me a ride home. I was grateful the scrapyard gave me $300 CASH. 🙂 And now as I go through the process of shopping for a new car, I just feel happy and joyous, not anxious and scared.
Next up? My home. I’ve been staying with my beloved for the last 2-1/2 months in a tiny trailer that is barely big enough for one person, let alone two. But again, I have enough money saved, not only for the new car, but also to move into a new home, it’s just a matter of finding the right thing.
In all this, I’ve learned that’s the bottom line — that Spirit HAS to guide me if I want my life to be this good. I can see now so clearly how the majority of the difficulties in my life were caused by ME, by making choices for all the wrong reasons — because somebody wanted me to do something, or didn’t want me to do something, or because I wanted to be rich, or because I was afraid, or because I wanted somebody to like me.
It’s the human condition. We want to avoid pain at all costs. We want love. We seek pleasure. But the trick is that sometimes the most pleasure comes after enduring a little bit of pain. And a life that we LOVE comes from learning what we fear, and cultivating the courage to move through that into our best and truest life.
Want a shamanic healing with me to create a life that you LOVE? Start by requesting a free phone consultation.